‘No apologies’ (‘NA’) is a unique Character-Building Curriculum on Abstinence. This ‘NA’ curriculum is currently being conducted in many parts of the world and it has been well received and has produced very encouraging results in countries such as Thailand, Philippines, southern Africa and Singapore, where young people are pledging to remain abstinent until marriage.

The purpose of this curriculum is to help youth to commit to delay sexual involvement and it is an achievable standard for them. It is aimed at helping our adolescents to:

1. Identify clearly the consequences associated with premarital sexual activity
2. Understand the value of healthy behaviours
3. Practise the skills necessary to achieve the goal of abstinence from premarital involvements

With abortions and babies born out of wedlock growing in numbers, teens should be taught the truth, that the consequences of premarital sexual activities are detrimental to their physical, social, emotional, mental and spiritual well-being. The ‘NA’ is a non-threatening, fun-filled, interactive, well-planned, structures and systematic curriculum which is effective with the young people of this generation.

‘NA’ has achieved tremendous results with young people taking the pledge to ‘Abstain’ from premarital sexual relationships and to save the best for marriage. By this one step the teenagers are taking on the true character of purity and to committing to a lifelong relationship to a life partner.

Women to Women asked Aaron Tham, Focus on the Family No Apologies Curriculum Coordinator, the following questions about the curriculum.

‘No Apologies – the truth about life, love and sex’ is a character-building curriculum on abstinence. The purpose of this curriculum is to help youth – both male and female – to commit to delay sexual involvement and to see it as an achievable standard. It identifies clearly the consequences associated with premarital sexual activity. The target group for the curriculum is youth from 13 to 18 years, and now we have extended the age group to include college students as well. The main purpose is to bring the message: ‘Abstinence – It Works Every Time’ to the youth.

Since its release in 1998, the No Apologies Curriculum has been well received by young people all over the world with almost a million youth taking the Pledge to remain abstinent from premarital sex and to remain faithful in their monogamous marriage.

The Curriculum addresses the youth as a whole person and takes into account their intellectual, ethical, physical, social and emotional being. We want to resist the ‘safe sex’ promotion message and to make a stand against legalised abortion and the homosexual agenda. The number one goal is to challenge our youth to take this ‘abstinence message’ and for them to make the choice to become men and women of good moral character.

Each participant who takes the step of commitment by taking the Pledge of abstinence will be asked to sign a Pledge Card which says: ‘Believing in saving myself for marriage, I make a commitment to myself, my family, my friends, my future spouse and my future children to be sexually abstinent from this day onward until the day I enter a lifelong, committed, monogamous marriage.’

The participant who signs a pledge card will be required to select an adult of his/her own choice to be the witness and accountable partner to his/her pledge. Participants are advised to select someone who is a responsible adult whom they can trust and who will not misuse the confidence placed in him/her.

We will keep participants who have attended our No Apologies workshops (whether they took the pledge or not) informed about the progress and development of this abstinence message in our country and the rest of the world. We will provide reports and news to participants through emails.

The purpose is to reinforce the message of abstinence to the youth and to (remind them) that this is the only 100% protection against STDs (sexually transmitted diseases).

There is no guarantee that the youth will keep to their pledge. However studies have shown that taking the pledge will help to delay their initiation into sexual activity by between one and three years. By then, we hope they will be more mature to make a sound decision on their own with regards to premarital sexual activity.

The contents of the Curriculum are applicable to youth from any ethnic or religious background. The responses from young people in countries where No Apologies has been conducted shows that the message of abstinence cuts across culture and religion. The Curriculum is presently conducted in: Costa Rica, east Africa, Japan, Mexico, Philippines, Singapore, South Africa, Thailand, Latin America – Argentina, Bolivia, Chile, Columbia, Cuba, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, El Salvador, Guatemala, Honduras, Nicaragua, Panama, Paraguay, Peru, Puerto Rico, Uruguay and Venezuela.

In our workshops, we present local life examples to enhance our messages and to make them applicable. The future of this generation of youth in Malaysia should be built upon the good foundation of moral values. This will bring about strong family structures that are to be passed on to the generations to come.

It also teaches about abstaining from other negative activities such as gambling, drugs, alcohol and pornography. ‘No Apologies – the truth about life, love + sex’ should be shared, taught and instilled in the lives of young people today and the generations to come. There is no problem reaching the young people with this curriculum and its message of abstinence.

Recently Focus on the Family Malaysia signed a Memorandum of Understanding with Systematic Education Group International Berhad (SEGi) to conduct the curriculum for 17,000 students in their colleges in West and East Malaysia.

We are in need of more facilitators to ensure that we can meet the demand for this curriculum at SEGi and other youth groups, clubs and organisations. Other educational institutions and school have also expressed keen interest in the curriculum.

In view of the demand, Ms Leslie Yeaton, the Manager of International Abstinence and Youth Outreach from Focus on the Family US will be conducting a training session for facilitators in Malaysia this September. We are targeting to train 150 facilitators.

We are honoured to have Lembaga Penduduk dan Pembangunan Keluarga Negara (LPPKN) support this curriculum. It is our vision that the No Apologies curriculum will be made available to all secondary schools and colleges in both East and West Malaysia, with the aim of bringing good moral values back into the lives of our young people in the nation.