THE bride in white walks gracefully and guardedly down the aisle towards the waiting bridegroom. She is the most beautiful woman in the hall. All eyes gaze upon her radiant loveliness. The bridesmaids and the flower girls, dressed in spaghetti-striped gowns, also draw the attention of the people. The atmosphere is almost ‘unreal’. There’s a touch of both Disneyland and Hollywood, and the spectators at the modern church wedding are mesmerised.
As the bride continues her walk down the aisle, eyes move from her smiling face to the details of her wedding gown. Some are a little disturbed by what they see. Some may shrug it off. “This is the 21 st century. We’ve got to go with the fashion trends.” I often wonder how the officiating ministers manage to concentrate without being more than ‘a little distracted’ by the bride’s and bridesmaids’ scant attire.
A senior pastor observed that one of the most disturbing trends creeping into the Malaysian Church today has to do with women’s attire in church, especially at church weddings. The wedding ceremony, one of the holiest and most solemn ceremonies, has turned into a fashion show of sorts. It is a fashion show displaying not the ‘best dressed’ but the ‘least dressed.’ The senior pastor lamented that perhaps the Malaysian Church has lost its cutting edge.
If we do not address this issue of proper attire in the holy place, we will not be able to attract our neighbours of other faiths who have a more respectful attitude towards places of worship. The Muslims and Hindus, for example, have such reverence for their places of worship that they ensure they are properly attired and their women are covered up when they worship. In contrast, Christians tend to be lax and seem to have thrown away decorum in dressing and grooming in the name of ‘liberty in the Spirit.’ It is time for Christian women to bring back modesty in their attire.
“A senior pastor observed that one of the most disturbing trends creeping into the Malaysian Church today has to do with women’s attire in church, especially at church weddings.”
Modest Dressing
The subject of modest dressing can be controversial among Christians today. Yet, it is an issue that every church ought to face. M. Thaxter Dickey writing on the subject says, ‘Every family, every Christian woman must consider modesty not only as a philosophical, theological and doctrinal issue but as a practical daily concern.’ 1
Today’s Scenario
Immodesty is a serious problem today because we are living in an era that glorifies immodesty and immorality. Just look at the commercial advertisements of today – regardless of what they are advertising (cars, food, cosmetics, etc). The focus is not on the product but on the immodestly-dressed man or woman. No wonder immodesty is now so commonly accepted and it does not disturb most people. The younger generation has no qualms about dressing like the supermodels and celebrity models.
M. Thaxter Dickey observes: “At least superficially, they seem to have no shame about this kind of dress. I suspect that they do have doubts but they are reluctant to admit them and so suppress them lest they be thought to be ‘prudes’ or ‘religious fanatics’ or ‘fashion fascists.’ And those who ought to be condemning this kind of behaviour, fathers, preachers, and elders, often fear to do so for the very same reason.” 2
What is Modesty?
Modesty is decency. It is not sexually provocative. Another writer, David Feddes, puts it very well. ‘If you are modest, you have a kind of shyness about sexuality, a discomfort with crude jokes and lewd stares. This doesn’t mean you are ashamed of your body or that you think it’s bad. If you are modest…there’s a strong sense that this passion (love life) is very precious, personal and private. Nakedness may be lovely in the marriage bed but not as a public display.’ 3
Large numbers of women in our immodest culture just do not get it. They choose to wear immodest clothing. Pastor and author Douglas Wilson says: ‘Many of the current fashions for young women appear to be apparel in standard use down at the local Hooker Training Academy.’
Some styles are so similar to prostitutes that Wilson’s wife told him ‘it must be difficult for men these days trying to figure out which ones they have to pay for and which ones are free.’
Unfortunately, today even many church people dress indecently to church services. Wilson puts it this way: ‘Many Christian women go to worship today dressed in a manner that would have gotten them thrown out of a bar fifty years ago.’ 4
What does Scripture say about modest dress for Christian women?
God does not give us a detailed dress code in the Bible. He does not require Christian women today to hide behind thick veils or look plain and dowdy. In God’s eyes, character matters more than clothing. But He is concerned about modesty and calls for it in our dressing and appearance. This message is needed today even more than when it was first written!
1. Peter 3:3–4
‘Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewellery and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfailing beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.’
1 Timothy 2:9–10
‘I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.’
These passages are primarily a condemnation of finery and ostentation rather than sexual immorality, but they also contain the positive injunction to women to dress appropriately as befits a people who profess to be godly.
Proverbs 7:10
‘Then out came a woman to meet him, dressed like a prostitute and with crafty intent.’ This passage is a powerful acknowledgement that some forms of dress are designed to attract unlawful sexual desire and are
Why is modesty important to Christian women?
Does modesty matter in today’s church? Besides the scriptural injunction in 1 Peter 3 and 1 Timothy 2 that exhort Christian women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety befitting one who confesses to godliness, there are other practical reasons for maintaining modest dress. M Thaxter Dickey gives five reasons why Christian women should not dress immodestly.
- It is unfair to men
Men are easily aroused by ‘sight’. It is therefore dangerous to their souls to see women dressed indecently, especially in church. Though the weak-ness may be theirs, women should not be a stumbling block to our fellow brethren.
‘Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother’s way.’ (Romans 14:13).
‘Be careful, however, that the exercise of your freedom does not become a stumbling block to the weak’ (1 Cor. 8:9).
- It is a dangerous threat to chastity Clothing is an important non-verbal communication that sends signals to the receivers. Thus, indecent dressing sends signals that can lead to sexual violation. Many rape cases occur due to impropriety in dressing on the part of the victims.
Dickey advises, ‘Chastity must be motivated by respect for one’s body and the dignity of others. Parents, especially fathers who ought to know about such things, should be watchful so that immoral fashions and attitudes do not violate the integrity of the home, especially through the uncritical acceptance of the messages of the mass media.’ 5
- Immodest dress is unfair to other women
Today’s fashion trend is putting pressure on women to compete for the sexual attention of men. This invariably reduces the value of women to that of a sex object. Dickey again puts it succinctly: ‘It is unfair to women because it forces them into a restrictive code of dress and beauty that is primarily sexual.
Women today find themselves competing with the artificial sexy image of womanhood that Hollywood and Madison Avenue have created… that is the reason for the plethora of women’s mental problem of insecurity and low self esteem as well as the actual physical health produced by excess dieting in a futile attempt to measure up.’ 6
- It is an indicator of certain character
‘Clothes maketh a man’, so the saying goes. The way one dresses indicates the character and personality of the wearer. Clothing is a powerful non-verbal message. As Christian women, it is important to send the right signals through our dressing. Related to this, the Bible speaks of ‘the attire of the harlot’ (Proverbs 7:10) which indicates to us that there is an inappropriate way of dressing which Christian women must be careful to avoid.
Dickey says of today’s fashion, “Modern dress is nothing short of exhibitionism. Women who choose to display their breasts, thighs or buttocks, either mostly uncovered or with form fitting clothes, to public view must at best endure the public attention that it brings and at worst they must enjoy this kind of exposure.” 7
- Immodest dressing reflects poorly on one’s vocation as a Christian woman
To put it simply, modesty in dressing is a tes-timony to unbelievers. While Christian women do not want to be branded as ‘old fashioned’, ‘prudish or ‘fashion fascists’, we want to project to the world that we are a people who believe in decency, chastity and purity. We may be regarded as peculiar to the ungodly, but don’t forget, we are a set-apart people, set apart from the garish, glitzy, exploiting, mindless fashion world of today.
Our outward appearance should reflect the spiritual convictions we hold so dearly. We must not contradict our faith and convictions by immodest dressing.
Conclusion
The subject of modest dressing for the Christian woman cannot be exhausted in this one article. I am aware there are many more points for discussion, for example the cultural differences in interpretation of what constitutes ‘modesty.’
What might be immodest in one culture would not be so in another, for instance revealing of the hands, ankles, face, etc. What is culturally inappropriate in one culture may be totally acceptable in another. However, it is hoped that Christian women would agree that ‘immodest attire’ is that state of dress or (undress) which flaunts a person’s body and sexuality.
Christians, note the way we dress when we go to church. How different are we from those going to discos or entertainment centres? While it is true that the Bible does not give us a detailed dress code, and passages like 1 Peter 3:3–5 and 1 Timothy 2:9–10 are more concerned with character and conduct rather than clothes or external appearance, nevertheless, Scriptures call for modesty and propriety.
The problem with today’s church is that we tend to stretch our Christian liberty too far. It is time to remind ourselves, that as Christian women we have a testimony to maintain. We do this not only with our actions, words and deeds but also in the way we dress and make ourselves presentable, for we are the Bride of the Bridegroom.
Tean Yin is a member of the NECF Women’s Commission.
- M. Thaxter Dickey, Considering the Issue of Modest Dress for Christian Women ( online) available @file://localhost/A://modsrty.htm
- Ibid
- David feddes, Back to God Hour, (online0 available @ http://www.backtogod.net/sermons/ sermons_detail.cfm?ID=36304 accessed 04/15/2004
- Ibid
- M. Thaxter dickey, Considering the Issue of Modern Dress for Christian Women (online) Available @file://localhost/A:/modesty.htm.
- Ibid.
- Ibid.
‘Clothes maketh a man’, so the saying goes. The way one dresses indicates the character and personality of the wearer.”
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